英語笑話是指以一句英文短語或一個(gè)英文故事讓說話者和聽者之間覺得好笑,或是產(chǎn)生幽默感,笑話是一種經(jīng)過藝術(shù)加工的語言形式,是藝術(shù)化的語言,笑話是一種藝術(shù)方法。下面是小編整理的英語爆笑笑話，以供大家閱讀。

Part-time Job業(yè)余工作

When my son was a hign-school sophomore, he got a part-time job sacking groceries at a supermarket. He came home all smiles.

"How was your first day?" I asked.

"It was great, Dad," he replied. "I got to talk to some good-looking girls."

Since Stephen is not very talkative, I asked, "What did you say to them?"

"Do you prefer paper or plastic?"

我兒子在一所中學(xué)讀二年級(jí)時(shí)，在一家超級(jí)市場(chǎng)找到了一份包裝商品的業(yè)余工作。他滿面笑容地回到了家。

“第一天感覺如何?”我問。

“好極了，爸爸?！彼鸬?，“我跟許多漂亮的女孩子講了話?！?/p>

由于斯蒂芬不善言談，我問道：“你跟他們說了些什么?”

“你是喜歡紙包裝還是塑料包裝?”

Teacher: Find Australia on the map for me, Johnny.

Johnny: It's there, sir.

Teacher: That's right. Now Sammy, who discovered Australia?

Sammy: Johnny, sir.

老師：約翰尼，在地圖上給我找出澳大利亞在什么地方。

約翰尼：先生，在這兒。

老師：對(duì)了。薩默，你來回答我是誰發(fā)現(xiàn)了澳大利亞?

薩默：先生，是約翰尼。

Unexpected guests were on the way, and my mother, an impeccable housekeeper, rushed around straightening up. She put my father and brother to work cleaning the guest bathroom. Later, when she went to inspect it, she was surprised that the once-cluttered room had been tidied up so quickly. Then she saw the note on the closed shower curtains. It read "Thank you for not looking in the bathtub."

不速之客就在路上，我媽媽，一個(gè)完美的家庭主婦，正忙里忙外地整理。她分配給我爸和我哥哥的任務(wù)是打掃供客人使用的浴室。一會(huì)兒之后，當(dāng)她去檢查的時(shí)候，她吃驚了，曾經(jīng)一度雜亂的房間瞬間就被打掃干凈了。接著她看到浴簾上有一張紙條，紙條上寫著：“謝謝你沒往浴缸里看?！?/p>英語爆笑笑話篇四：Christmas Eve Service平安夜禮拜

Just as I began my Christmas Eve service, the electricity in the church failed. The ushers and I found some candles and placed them around the sanctuary. Then I reentered the pulpit, shuffled my notes, and muttered, "Now, where was I?" A tired voice called out, "Right near the end!"

就在我開始平安夜禱告時(shí)，教堂停電了。教堂里的接待人員和我找到一些蠟燭，把它們放在禮堂周圍。然后我重返講道壇，整理了一下筆記后，我說：“剛才我講到哪兒了?”傳來一陣不耐煩的聲音：“馬上就講完了!”

An instructor in chemical warfare asked soldiers in his class: "Anyone knows the formula for water?""Sure. That's easy," said one man."What is it?""H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O.""What, what?" reasked the instructor."H to O," explained the chemistry expert.

生化戰(zhàn)爭(zhēng)課的老師在課堂上問士兵們：“誰知道水的分子式?”“當(dāng)然，太簡(jiǎn)單了?！币粋€(gè)士兵回答道。“是什么?”“H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O.”“什么，什么?”老師又問道。“H to O，”化學(xué)專家解釋道。

Frog The science teacher lecturing his class in biology said, "Now I'll show you this frog in my pocket." He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a chicken sandwich. He looked puzzled for a second, thought deeply, and said, "That's funny. I distinctly remember eating my lunch."

老師正在給學(xué)生上生物課：“現(xiàn)在，我將要給你們看我袋子里的這只青蛙。”接著，他把手伸進(jìn)口袋，卻拿出了一份雞肉三文治。老師滿臉困惑地看了一眼，沉思了一會(huì)兒，說道：“真奇怪。我明明記得我已經(jīng)把午飯吃掉了?！?/p>  

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